Santa ke bagiche mein bahut sare ped

Santa ke bagiche mein bahut sare ped – paudhe thay, Santa naukar ko bola ped-paudhon ko pani dal.

Naukar: Sahab baarish ho rahi hai.

Santa: Abe to Chatri leke dal….

Santaquots wife dies he is calm but

Santa"s wife dies. He is calm, but his wife"s lover is crying furiously…

Finally, santa consoles him: Don"t worry buddy, I will marry again….

Girl will u marry me santa

Girl: Will u marry me?

Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai. Mummy ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se…

Santa dials a number a girl receives

Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.

Santa: Who r u?

Girl: Seeta here.

Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya….

Santa among my 4 sons 3

Santa : Among My 4 Sons 3 R Engineers

Frnd:4th?

Santa : Useles,Dnt Study, Becam A Barber

Frnd:Y ,Dnt U Throw Him Out

Santa : Coz He’s D Only 1 Who Earns..!…

Masterji kal school kyu nahi aaya

Masterji: kal school kyu nahi aaya.

Santa: Gir gaya tha or lag gayi.

Masterji: kahan gire, kahan lagi?

Santa: Takiye pe gira tha aur AANKH lag gayi…..

Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower

Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower
& red light glowing on the top,
seeing this he said “India is developing fast, see there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air

Santa mujhe shadi me bmw mili he

Santa: Mujhe Shadi Me BMW Mili He.

Banta: Pr Tumhare Pass To Koi Car Nahi He!

Santa: Abye Ghadhe,

BMW Ka Matlab

Bahut Motti Wife…..

Santa yaar a auratein sharab se

Santa- Yaar!

A Auratein Sharab

Se Nafrat Q Karati Hai?

Banta- Islye Ki,

Sharab Pine Ke

Baad Chuhe Jaisa

Pati Bhi Sher

Ho Jata Hai.

Frog tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai

Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.

Santa: Hai.

Frog: Nahin hai.

Santa: Hai.

Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.

Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?…

Maths teacher 2 santaif u had 1000rs

Maths teacher 2 Santa,if u had 1000Rs in one pocket and 1000 Rs in other pocket, wat would u think?

Santa : yar mai kithay abbay di pant tay nai paa litti??…

Teacher now children if i saw a

Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped

him, what virtue would I be showing? santa: Brotherly love….

Wats d diff bw bus amp cycle

Wats D Diff. B/W Bus & Cycle?

Santa:Bus Ka Stand Bus Ke Sath Kabhi Nahi Jata

Par Cycle Ka Stand Cycle Ke Sath Jata Hai….

Snt bnt talkng snt oy to

S@nT@ B@Nt@ TAlKNg:

S@Nt@: oY to kaM Ni kaRta tUje pOLice pakEr kR Le jAe gI?

B@NT@ :vo kU?

S@nt@:aik adMi kam nI Krta tHA Ose p0LIcE pakr k Le gYi.

B@nT@: KiS JUrM Me?

S@Nt@:KyUnkE Vo kaM ChoR Tha. . . . .=P;->…

1 banda bhagta howa aata hay aur

1 banda bhagta howa aata hay

aur Santa se kehta hai

bhai jaldi jao tumharey ghar main

salaab ka pani ghus gaya hay.

Santa: Oye kion jhoot bolta hay,

ghar ki chabi to meray paas hay:D:D

Santa my dad was an extremely brave

Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion"s cage.

Banta: He probably got a lot of applause ven he got out.

Santa: I didn"t say he got out…

Banta ek sadhu se bola baba meri

Banta ek sadhu se bola: Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao.

Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?…

Banta yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?

Santa: Suicide karne ke liye

Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?

Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye…

Santas army test pappu 35 santa

Santa’s Army Test

Pappu- 3+5?

Santa- 8

Pappu- 7+3?

Santa- 10

Pappu- 8+8?

Santa- Pata nahi sir

Mere pass sirf 10 hi ungli Hai.

(=awaD o_0

W!LD T3XT3R…

Santa yaar uth bhukamp aa raha hai

Santa: Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai, Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai.

Banta- Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Maalik Ka, Hum To Kirayedar Hain…..

Santa amp banta sending sms 2 their

Santa & banta sending sms 2 their gfs. Santa:mai tere mobile se apni gf ko sms bheju dekhte hain kya kahti hai? Banta: No, agar usne handwriting pehchan li to…?…

I have liked many but loved very

I have liked many but loved very few yet no one has been as sweet as you. I"d stand & wait in the world"s longest queue just 4 the pleasure of a moment with u….

A lady calls santa for repairing dorr

A lady calls santa for repairing dorr bell.

Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.

Lady calls again,santa replies.i’m coming daily since 4 days,i press the bell but no one comes out…

Master mein tenu kutte te essay likhan

Master: Mein tenu kutte te essay likhan nu

keha si, Likh ke kyu nahi liyanda ?

Santa: Ki karda master g,

jidan he mein kutte te Pen rakhia oh paj geya!!!…

Santa sir hun meri salary wada deyo

Santa: Sir hun meri salary wada deyo, mera vyah ho gaya hai.

Boss: Factory de bahar hon wale hadseyaan layi factory jimmevar nahin hundi….

Santa goes for a interview the post

SANTA goes for a interview for the post of a DETECTIVE.

Interviewer Asked- WHO KILLED GANDHI..?

SANTA- Thanx for giving me the JOB.

I will Investigate… ;->…

Judge y uve stolen money 4m dis

Judge: Y U’ve stolen money 4m dis man?

Sardar: My lord I’ve nt stolen money. He jst gave it 2 me

Judge: Whn He gave U money ?

Sardar: Whn I showd him gun ;->…

Santa was driving car zigzag and rashley

Santa was driving car zigzag and rashley..!

Traffic cop caught him..

Santa- Sir im Learning how 2 drive..!

Cop said- without instructor..?

Santa said- yeh correspondence course hai… ;->…

Preeto raat ko aap peeke gutter mein

Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.

Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin….

Banta: O G paise wapas

Banta selling Parashut:Plane se kudo Button Dabao Aur aap zamin pe
safely land!
Custmer: Agar Parashut na khula to?
Banta: O G paise wapas

Santa was walking thru d forest

Santa Was Walking Thru D Forest

He Saw Snake Hanging On D Tree.

Santa: Sirf Latak Ne Se Height Nahi Badegi,

Mummy Ko Bolo Complann Pilaye…..

Santa 2 banta yar ye t0u morning

SanTA 2 BaNta

YaR Ye t0u MoRnInG MorNiNg bukS OThA K KaHA Ja rAhA Hai?

SaNta : yAr mAI EngLIsH sEKHnE JA rAha HN.

BANta:v0 ku?

SanTa:v0 muJhE KAVe(cRoW)Se coMpLx HOGya HAi.

BaNta: CRow Se ku yAR?

SanTa:B’Cz cRoW B eNgLISh bLta HAi.

BnTa:it’s iMpOSBlE.

SanTa:YAR DKh siPmlE CRow blTA HeNA

COW coW C0W…

Teacher to santa where were you born

Teacher to santa: where were you born?

Santa: Thiruvananthapuram

Teacher: can u spell it?

Santa (after thinking for some time): I think I was born in GOA….

Aftr returning frm a foreign trip santa

Aftr returning frm a foreign trip

Santa asks his wife "Do I luk like a foreigner?"

Wife-"No,y r u asking?"

Santa-"In London a lady asked me,r u a FoReiGneR? ;->…

Sardar to another sardar u knw my

Sardar To Another Sardar: U Knw My Grand Mother Started Walking 5 Miles A Day When She Was Sixty.

She Is Eighty Now &

We Don’t Know Where D Hell She Is ;->…

Ultimate answer while changing the job

Ultimate answer while changing the job.

Interviewer: Why did you changed your last job?

Santa: Because the company shifted and didn"t tell me where…..

Preeto 2 maid oh kanta i hv

Preeto 2 maid: Oh Kanta, I hv reason 2 suspect that Banta is having an affair with his secretary.

Kanta: I don"t believe it! U r just trying 2 make me jealous….

Santa shouting 2 his gf quot

Santa Shouting 2 His GF

" U Said V Will Do Register

Marriage And U Cheated Me,

I Was Waiting 4 U

Yesterday Whole Day

In The Post Office…

Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho

Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi.

Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai?

Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi….

Santa my wife died yesterday im

Santa – My wife died yesterday..

I’m trying to cry but tears are not come out,

what to do?

Banta – No Problem.

Just Imagine she Came Back. :D…

Santa beer bar ch ro riha c bar

Santa: Beer-Bar ch ro riha c. Bar owner: Kyon ro rahe ho?

SANTA: Oye ki karaan?

Main jis kudi da naam bhulna chahunda haan usda naam yaad hi nahi aa riha…..

Taxi driver to Santa

Taxi driver to Santa: sardarji petrol khatam ho
gaya hai gaddi aage nahin ja sakati.
Santa: koi gal nahin GAADI PICHHE LELO .

Santa i have swallowed a key

Santa: I have swallowed a key.

Doctor: When?

Santa: 3 months back!

Doctor: What were you doing till now?

Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too…

Santa ki amma mar gyi 1 admi

Santa Ki Amma Mar Gyi.

1 Admi Bola-Amma Mujhe Le Jati

2-4 Or Bole-Amma Hume Bi Le Jati

S:-Chup Ho Jao Kamino

Amma Kya suzuki Dala Kr Ke Gyi He…

Santa yaar banta doctor ne kaha hy

Santa: Yaar Banta, Doctor Ne Kaha Hy Mujhe AIDS Hy. Ye AIDS Hota Kia Hai. . . ? ?

Banta:

A – Ab

I – Is

D – Dunya Se

S – Satt Shri Kal. . . ;->…

Santa was recruiting lawyers for a firm

Santa was recruiting Lawyers for a firm. He was taking interviews.

Santa : Do u knw all d laws ?

Lawyer : Yes !

Santa : Tell me 3rd law of Thermodynamics ;->

Santa phoned his wife i am not

Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home. The stearing, dash board, gears of car have been stolen.

After sometime he calls again: I am coming, earlier I sat on the back seat….

A Couple havin sex

A Couple havin sex on upper berth in train, by chance bra fals down
on santa, he says: O paji ye kya kiya, doodh aapne piya, aur packet
hamare upar faink diya……

Santa soch raha hu ki usa

Santa : Soch Raha Hu Ki USA Ghum Aaun,

Kitna Paisa Lagega?

Banta : Kuch B Nahi

Santa : Kaise?

Banta : Sochne K Liye Paise Nahi Lagte…