The reproduction of mankind is a great

The reproduction of mankind is a great marvel and mystery.  Had God consulted me in the matter, I should have advised him to continue the generation of the species by fashioning them out of clay.  ~Martin Luther

Instruction in sex is as important instruction

Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime.  ~George Bernard Shaw, Everybody’s Political What’s What, 1944CTO

When a man goes on date he

When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky.  A woman already knows.  ~Frederike Ryder

I once knew a woman who offered

I once knew a woman who offered her honor
So I honored her offer
And all night long I was on her and off her.
~Author Unknown

The common thread that binds nearly all

[T]he common thread that binds nearly all animal species seems to be that males are willing to abandon all sense and decorum, even to risk their lives, in the frantic quest for sex.  ~Randy Thornhill and Craig T. Palmer, A Natural History of Rape

My reaction to porn films is as

My reaction to porn films is as follows:  After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw.  After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live.  ~Erica Jong, Playboy Magazine, September 1975

When authorities warn you of the sinfulness

When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned.  Do not have sex with the authorities.  ~Matt Groening"Basic Sex Facts For Today’s Youngfolk," Life in Hell

Men wake up aroused in the morning

Men wake up aroused in the morning.  We can’t help it.  We just wake up and we want you.  And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?"  It’s because we can’t see you.  We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.  ~Andy Rooney

I regret to say that we of

I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce.  ~J. Edgar Hoover, attributedHHQ

My father told me all about the

My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar – I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty-one.  ~Bob Hope

Out upon it i have lovd three

Out upon it, I have lov’d
Three whole days together;
And am like to love three more,
If it prove fair weather.
~John Suckling

Sex is the great amateur art the

Sex is the great amateur art.  The professional, male or female, is frowned on:  he or she misses the point, and spoils the show.  ~David CortSocial Astonishments, 1963

desire is in men a hunger

Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite.  ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960CDN

I think men talk to women so

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them.  ~Jay McInerneyBrightness Falls, 1992

There are three possible parts to a

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered:  entertainment, food, and affection.  It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection.  As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately.  When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating.  Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.  ~Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour

When a man talks dirty to woman

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment.  When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 a minute.  ~Author Unknown

What is commonly called love namely the

What is commonly called love, namely the desire of satisfying a voracious appetite with a certain quantity of delicate white human flesh.  ~Henry FieldingTom Jones, bk VI, ch 1, 1749

Life without sex might be safer but

Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull.  It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all.  Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill.  ~Henry Louis Mencken

Never let the little head do thinking

Never let the little head do the thinking for the big head.  ~Author unknown, advice to teenage boys, quoted in Friendly Advice compiled by Jon Winokur

There is nothing wrong with going to

There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex.  People should be very free with sex, they should draw the line at goats.  ~Elton John