Programming today is a race between software

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots.  So far, the Universe is winning.  ~Rich Cook

And then it occurred to me that

[A]nd then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things.  They are, in short, a perfect match.  ~Bill Bryson

Its the only job i can think

It’s the only job I can think of where I get to be both an engineer and an artist.  There’s an incredible, rigorous, technical element to it, which I like because you have to do very precise thinking.  On the other hand, it has a wildly creative side where the boundaries of imagination are the only real limitation.  ~Andy Hertzfeld, about programming

Programming languages should be designed not by

Programming languages should be designed not by piling feature on top of feature, but by removing the weaknesses and restrictions that make additional features appear necessary.  ~Author Unknown

Ready fire aim the fast approach to

Ready, fire, aim:  the fast approach to software development.  Ready, aim, aim, aim, aim:  the slow approach to software development.  ~Author Unknown

When a programming language is created that

When a programming language is created that allows programmers to program in simple English, it will be discovered that programmers cannot speak English.  ~Author Unknown

There does not now nor will there

There does not now, nor will there ever exist, a programming language in which it is the least bit hard to write bad programs.  ~Lawrence Flon

Program n a magic spell cast over

Program, n.  A magic spell cast over a computer allowing it to turn one’s input into error messages; v. tr. To engage in a pastime similar to banging one’s head against a wall, but with fewer opportunities for reward.  ~Author Unknown

When you catch bugs early also get

When you catch bugs early, you also get fewer compound bugs.  Compound bugs are two separate bugs that interact:  you trip going downstairs, and when you reach for the handrail it comes off in your hand.  ~Paul Graham, "The Other Road Ahead," 2001

The only way for errors to occur

The only way for errors to occur in a program is by being put there by the author.  No other mechanisms are known.  Programs can’t acquire bugs by sitting around with other buggy programs.  ~Harlan Mills

Any fool can write code that a

Any fool can write code that a computer can understand.  Good programmers write code that humans can understand.  ~Martin Fowler

Good code is its own best documentation

Good code is its own best documentation.  As you’re about to add a comment, ask yourself, "How can I improve the code so that this comment isn’t needed?"  ~Steve McConnell

Everyone knows that debugging is twice as

Everyone knows that debugging is twice as hard as writing a program in the first place.  So if you are as clever as you can be when you write it, how will you ever debug it?  ~Brian Kernighan

If you cannot grok the overall structure

If you cannot grok the overall structure of a program while taking a shower, e.g., with no external memory aids, you are not ready to code it.  ~Richard Pattis

What i mean is that if you

What I mean is that if you really want to understand something, the best way is to try and explain it to someone else.  That forces you to sort it out in your own mind.  And the more slow and dim-witted your pupil, the more you have to break things down into more and more simple ideas.  And that’s really the essence of programming.  By the time you’ve sorted out a complicated idea into little steps that even a stupid machine can deal with, you’ve certainly learned something about it yourself.  ~Douglas Adams

Its easy to cry 34bug34 when the

It’s easy to cry "bug" when the truth is that you’ve got a complex system and sometimes it takes a while to get all the components to co-exist peacefully.  ~Doug Vargas

Version 1 of any software is full

Version 1 of any software is full of bugs.  Version 2 fixes all the bugs and is great.  Version 3 adds all the things users ask for, but hides all the great stuff in Version 2.  ~Fred BlechmanDCQ