I came from a big family as

I came from a big family.  As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married.  ~Lewis GrizzardFCN

A man marries to have a home

A man marries to have a home, but also because he doesn’t want to be bothered with sex and all that sort of thing.  ~W. Somerset MaughamFD

Marriage is an alliance entered into by

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can’t sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can’t sleep with the window open.  ~George Bernard Shaw

By the time youre his shivering and

By the time you’re his
Shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is
Infinite, undying
Lady, make a note of this:
One of you is lying.
~Dorothy ParkerWRM

For two people in a marriage to

For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the one miracle the Vatican has overlooked.  ~Bill Cosby, Love and Marriagerdqqfeb2003

A woman who loves her husband is

A woman who loves her husband is merely paying her bills.  A woman who loves her lover gives alms to the poor.  ~Paul-Jean TouletCUL

In every marriage more than a week

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce.  The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage.  ~Robert Anderson, Solitaire & Double Solitaire

Being divorced is like being hit by

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck.  If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.  ~Jean Kerr, Mary, Mary, 1960

Marriage isnt all that its cracked up

Marriage isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.  Let me tell you, honestly.  Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce.  ~Larry Gelbart, M*A*S*H, "Bulletin Board," original airdate 14 January 1975, spoken by the character Frank Burns

I dreamed of a wedding elaborate elegance

I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance,
A church filled with family and friends.
I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for,
He said one that would make me his wife.
~Author Unknown

After a few years of marriage man

After a few years of marriage, a man can look right at a woman without seeing her – and a woman can see right through a man without looking at him.  ~Helen RowlandRDM; WL; WRM

One of the good things that come

One of the good things that come of a true marriage is, that there is one face on which changes come without your seeing them; or rather there is one face which you can still see the same, through all the shadows which years have gathered upon it.  ~George MacDonaldRDM

The concern that some women show at

The concern that some women show at the absence of their husbands, does not arise from their not seeing them and being with them, but from their apprehension that their husbands are enjoying pleasures in which they do not participate, and which, from their being at a distance, they have not the power of interrupting.  ~Michel de MontaigneRDM

Someone once asked me why women dont

Someone once asked me why women don’t gamble as much as men do, and I gave the common-sensical reply that we don’t have as much money.  That was a true but incomplete answer.  In fact, women’s total instinct for gambling is satisfied by marriage.  ~Gloria Steinem, In Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions, 1983, "Night Thoughts of a Media Watcher," Ms., November 1981

In the opinion of world marriage ends

In the opinion of the world, marriage ends all, as it does in a comedy.  The truth is precisely the opposite:  it begins all.  ~Anne Sophie SwetchineRDM

Before marriage a girl has to make

Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him.  After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.  ~Marilyn Monroe

Its easy to understand love at first

It’s easy to understand love at first sight, but how do we explain love after two people have been looking at each other for years?  ~Author Unknown

Come lets be a comfortable couple and

Come, let’s be a comfortable couple and take care of each other!  How glad we shall be, that we have somebody we are fond of always, to talk to and sit with.  ~Charles Dickens

People do not marry people real ones

People do not marry people, not real ones anyway; they marry what they think the person is; they marry illusions and images.  The exciting adventure of marriage is finding out who the partner really is.  ~James L. Framo, "Explorations in Marital & Family Therapy"RDM

I love being married its so great

I love being married.  It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.  ~Rita Rudner

Once a woman has forgiven her man

Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast.  ~Marlene Dietrich, "Forgiveness," Marlene Dietrich’s ABC, 1962, PMB p170

It is easier to be a lover

It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty every day than to say pretty things from time to time.  ~Balzac, Physiologie du mariage, 1829LCD

The view that a peptic ulcer may

The view that a peptic ulcer may be the hole in a man’s stomach through which he crawls to escape from his wife has fairly wide acceptance.  ~John Allan Dalrymple AndersonDCMOO

I figure that the degree of difficulty

I figure that the degree of difficulty in combining two lives ranks somewhere between rerouting a hurricane and finding a parking place in downtown Manhattan.  ~Claire Cloninger, "When the Glass Slipper Doesn’t Fit and the Silver Spoon is in Someone Else’s Mouth"RDM

You can never be happily married to

You can never be happily married to another until you get a divorce from yourself.  Successful marriage demands a certain death to self.  ~Jerry
McCantRDM

Why does a woman work ten years

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man’s habits and then complain that he’s not the man she married?  ~Barbra Streisand

Men who have a pierced ear are

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.  ~Rita RudnerWRM

Love seems the swiftest but it is

Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths.  No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.  ~Mark TwainRDM

In marriage there are no manners to

In marriage there are no manners to keep up, and beneath the wildest accusations no real criticism.  Each is familiar with that ancient child in the other who may erupt again…. We are not ridiculous to ourselves.  We are ageless.  That is the luxury of the wedding ring.  ~Enid Bagnold, Autobiography, 1969

That quiet mutual gaze of a trusting

That quiet mutual gaze of a trusting husband and wife is like the first moment of rest or refuge from a great weariness or a great danger.  ~George EliotRDM

Wasnt marriage like life unstimulating and unprofitable

Wasn’t marriage, like life, unstimulating and unprofitable and somewhat empty when too well ordered and protected and guarded.  Wasn’t it finer, more splendid, more nourishing, when it was, like life itself, a mixture of the sordid and the magnificent; of mud and stars; of earth and flowers; of love and hate and laughter and tears and ugliness and beauty and hurt.  ~Edna Ferber, Show Boat, 1926, ch. 19; CTO