Whenever a man has cast longing eye

Whenever a man has cast a longing eye on offices, a rottenness begins in his conduct.  ~Thomas Jefferson, letter to Tench Coxe, 21 May 1799, in Writings of Thomas Jefferson, 1896, vol. 7, p.381, MBT p273

The good news is the white house

The good news is the White House is now giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings.  Some of these jokes actually write themselves.  ~David Letterman

Dick cheney had a mild heart attack

Dick Cheney had a mild heart attack, but they say he’ll soon be able to resume his regular activities.  I thought having heart attacks was his regular activity.  Anyway, since he’s a Republican, the heart isn’t a major organ.  ~Jay Leno

Take our politicians theyre a bunch of

Take our politicians:  they’re a bunch of yo-yos.  The presidency is now a cross between a popularity contest and a high school debate, with an encyclopedia of cliches the first prize.  ~Saul Bellow

Youve got bush and gore headed to

You’ve got Bush and Gore headed to the Supreme Court.  You’ve got George W. Bush’s intelligence will be pitted against Al Gore’s honesty.  This is more like a case for small claims court.  ~Jay Leno

Every two years the american politics industry

Every two years the American politics industry fills the airwaves with the most virulent, scurrilous, wall-to-wall character assassination of nearly every political practitioner in the country – and then declares itself puzzled that America has lost trust in its politicians.  ~Charles Krauthammer

He struggles to exude authority furrows his

He struggles to exude authority.  He furrows his brow, trying to look more sagacious, but he ends up looking as if he has indigestion.  Appearing confused at his own speech, he seems like a first-grade actor in a production of James and the Giant Peach.  Are his blinks Morse code for "Oh, man, don’t let that teleprompter break?"  ~Maureen Dowd, about George W. Bush