Christmas is not a time nor season

Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind.

To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy,

is to have the real spirit of Christmas.

Memon ko current laga begum ne

Memon Ko Current Laga…

Begum Ne Memon Se Poocha:

Kuch Howa To Nahi..?

Memon Bola:

Mujhe Chorr

Bahir Jaa Kar Deakh

“UNIT” Kitne Gire Hai

Memon ya allah tu mujhe 1000rs de

Memon: YA ALLAH, tu mujhe

1000.Rs de ga to 500.Rs teri rah mein doon ga

Raste mein usko 500.Rs mile

Memon bola*YA ALLAH

Itna b barosa nahi

PEHLE HI KAAT LIYE

Sheikh shadi wali rat apni bv se

Sheikh shadi wali rat apni bv se: apna haath dejiay

BV n sharma k hath aagay barha dia or ankhain band ker leen,

jab thori dair me ankhain kholeen to sheikh marker se haath pe ghari bana raha tha.

BV: Ye kia ?

Sheikh: Sharmate huay…

Monh Dikhaee hai ji;

Teacher jo ander aane k liye sab

Teacher:

Jo Ander Aane K Liye Sab Se Chota

Sentence Bole Ga

Ussey Gift Mile Ga

Eng Child:

May I Come In?

Urdu Child:

Mai Andr A Skta Ho?

Memon:

Achivina

Sheikhon k larkay or larki mein pyar

Sheikhon k larkay or larki mein pyar ho gaya GIRL:Jab mere abu so jain gy to main Gali mein sikka Phaink dongi to tum foran andar aa jana, Lekin Larka sikka phenkne k 1 ghante baad aaya. GIRL,Itni Dair kion laga di? BOY,sikka Dhond raha tha, GIRL, Oh Pagal wo to main ne Dhaga baandh k phenka tha.

Memon k bete ka accident hovadrap ki

Memon k bete ka accident hova.
Dr:ap k bete ki dono tangen ktni parey gi
memon:sir pakr k beth gaya
Dr:kia hua
memon:afsos horha hy kal hi nai chapal dilai thi

Memon ka beta girl friend k

MEMON ka beta girl friend k sath ghoom k ghar ayato baap ne poocha,
kitnay paisay kharch kiye?Beta: 50 rupye.
Baap: itne saray?
Beta: Abba us k pas 50 hi thay.

Pehalwan ne mehfil me 1 limu se

Pehalwan ne Mehfil me

1 Limu se pura 1 Glass juice Nikal kar sabko Heran kar dia

Challenge kia aisa koi aur kar k dikhaye

Sab ne Haar Man Li

Tab 1 Kamzor se

Admi ne

Nichoray huwe Limu

se

1 Glass juice Mazeed nikal k Pehalwan

ko B Heran kar dia

Pehlwan:

Aap B Pehalwan ho kia

Admi:

Nahi Main’MEMON’hun :p

Memon ne arbi ko khoon dey k

Memon ne arbi ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.

Arbi ne usay MERCEDES gift kardi.

Arbi ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari,

Memon ne phir khoon dia.

Ab k bar Arbi ne till waly laddu gift kiye,

Memon:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?

Arbi:Munna…!!

Ab hamarey ander bhi Memon ka khoon dor raha hay…

Memon ka beta apni girl friend k

Memon ka beta apni girl friend

k sath date maar ker ghar aaya

to baap nay pocha,

kitnay paisay kharch karey?

Beta: Rs.50.

Baap:itne saray kion??

Beta: us k paas itne hi thay.

1 memon samandar mein d0ob gaya us

1 Memon samandar Mein d0ob gaya

us ne dua ki “YA ALLAH mujhay nikal de mein teri rah mein 1 chawal ki Degh doonga”.

1 LEHAR ne iss ko bahar nikal diya.

Bahar aa kar bola: KAUN SI DEGH?

Foran 1 Lehar Aai or iss ko wapis le gayi

To bola: YA ALLAH mein ne to yeh poocha tha

Chicken YA Beef?

Sheikh suhaag raat biwi sey apna haath

SHEIKH Suhaag Raat BIWI Sey: Apna Haath Dejye.

BIWI Ney Sharma Kay Haath Aagey Barhaya Aur Aankhain Band Kar Lein,

Thori Dair Baad Ankhain Kholen Tou SHEIKH Marker Sey Haath Peh Ghari Bana Raha Tha.

BIWI:Yeh Kiya?

SHEIKH:Munh Dikhai Hai !

Christmas is not a time nor season

Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind.

To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy,

is to have the real spirit of Christmas.

Sheikh at shop bhai 1 rs

Sheikh at shop:

Bhai, 1 Rs. ka easy load kar do!

ShopKeeper: Itna load karwa k call karni hai ya sms?

Sheikh: Karna te kuj v nai… Bus awein paise uraan di aadat ay! 😀

Memon ka beta abu 5 ropay do

Memon Ka Beta: Abu 5 Ropay Do Na

Abu: Nahin Dun Ga

Beta: Abu Day Do, Doodh Walay Aur Ami Ki

Ek Baat Bataun Ga.

Abu: Ye Lo 10 Rupay, Jaldi Batao..

Beta: Doodh Wala Ami Ko Bol Raha Tha K

Abhi Tak Is Maheenay K Pesay Nahi Diay

KaL Say Doodh Nahi Milay Ga.

Sirf Memon Hi Memon Say Pesa Nikalwa

Sakta Hai.

Memon beemar hua to check up k

Memon Beemar Hua To Check Up K Liye Gaya.

Dr: Drip Lagani Paregi

Memon Adhi Drip Laga Kar Acha Hogaya Aur Bola:

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‘Baaki Parcel Kardo’

Memon at petrol pump bhai 1rs ka

Memon At Petrol Pump:

Bhai 1rs Ka Petrol Dal Do.

Salesman:

Bhai Itna Sara Petrol

Dalva K Kahan Jana Hai?

Memon:

Jana Kahan Hai

Hm To Aise Hi Paise Urate Hen…

Somehow not only for christmas but all

Somehow, not only for Christmas, But all the long year

through, The joy that you give to others, Is the joy

that comes back to you. And the more you spend in blessing,

The poor and lonely and sad, The more of your heart’s

possessing, Returns to you glad.

Memon yeh kailabanana kaisay diya shopkeeper

Memon:

Yeh Kaila(Banana) Kaisay Diya?

Shopkeeper:

1rs.

Memon:

60 Paisa Ka Deta Hai?

S.K:

60 Paise Mein To Sirf Chilka Milega.

Memon:

Ley 40 Paisay

Chilka Rakh Aur Kela Day De

Sheikh meri biwi bari fzool kharch ay

Sheikh: Meri biwi bari fzool kharch ay

Jadon di shadi hoi ay roz 100, 200 mangdi ay.

Dost: Wo in paison ka kya karti hai?

Sheikh: Ki pta Mai kadi ditay ee nai

Eik memmon khali katorey main roti daba

EIK MEMMON KHALI KATOREY MAIN

ROTI DABA KAR KHA RAHA THA

WAITER NE DEKA TU POUCHA

AP YAH KIA KAR RAHEY HIAN

MEMON NE JAWAB DIYA

MAIN MATHS KA TEACHER HOON OR DALL

SUPPOSE KAR KAY KHARAHA HOON

Somehow not only for christmas but all

Somehow, not only for Christmas, But all the long

year

through, The joy that you give to others, Is the joy

that comes back to you. And the more you spend in blessing,

The poor and lonely and sad, The more of your heart?s

possessing, Returns to you glad.

Kanjoos aadmi ek hotel mai enter hua

Kanjoos Aadmi ek hotel mai enter hua..

Waiter: janab kia chahiye.?

Kanjoos: Mai Subah yahan naashta kar ke gaya tha,

kuch bach gaya tha, Wohi le aao..

Who is memon memon has 600

Who Is Memon?

Memon Has 600 Years Old History.

There Is No1 Single Non Muslim

In MEMON Nation.

All Memons Are Muslims.

This Is The Unique Quality

Which No Other Nation Has

Memon Is The 1st One To Give

Blank Cheque To Quaid-E-Azam

In Order To Fund State Bank

The Man Was Great Seth

Adamjee Dawood

Memons Has Undefeatable

Business Tycoos

Like

Rangoonwala

Tabanis

Gadarz And Many Others

Memons Also Have Great Legends Like

Waheed Murad

No Nation Has These Qualities But

Memon Nation Have.

(¯`v´¯)

`*.¸.*´ lover

¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)

(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•

Prince”

Golden words ksi ko uski chapal

GOLDEN WORDS*

Ksi Ko Uski ‘CHAPAL’ or Puranay LIBAS Ki Wjah Se ‘GHAREEB’ Na Smjho

Ho skta hy wo

‘ MEM0N’ Ho..??

Memon se marny k baad farishty ne

Memon se marny k Baad farishty ne Pucha:

”koi naiki ki thi Duniya mein?

Memon: ‘haan aik faqeer ko 1 Rupiya dia tha, 1 Masjid mein 1 lota Rakhwaya tha, 1 Hospital ko 5 Rupay diye thay, farishtay ne kaha,

Ye lay apne 6 Rupay, Lota Pakarr aur Dozakh mein chal Shabash….

Advertisement

Ek memon ko jin charh gaya 3

Ek Memon Ko Jin Charh Gaya

3 Din Baad

Jin Khud Aalim Ke Paas Gaya Aur

Bola:

Aalim Sahab!

Ujhe Bahar Nikalo

Mein To Bhooka Hee Mar Jaonga

Somehow not only for christmas but all

Somehow, not only for Christmas, But all the long year through, The joy that you give to others, Is the joy that comes back to you. And the more you spend in blessing, The poor and lonely and sad, The more of your heart’s possessing, Returns to you glad.

Important msg by islamic reasearch foundation attention

Important Msg. By Islamic Reasearch Foundation: Attention All Muslims. Before 25 Dec. Sab Ko Batain Khud Be Amal Karain. Don’t Say Marry Chrismas. Jik Ka Matlab Hy Ke Ap Is Baat Ki Gawahi De Rahe Ho Ke Allah Ne 25 Dec Ko Bata Jana.’ Nauzubillah! Avoid & Delete Chrismas Sms Save Ur Emaan

o SMS# 373565

()”'() ,*

( ‘o’ ) ,***

=(,,)=(”)<-***
(”),,,(”) ‘**

Roses 4 u…

MERRY CHRISTMAS to

U…

Sheikh girl yar aj papa ne

Sheikh girl:

Yar aj papa ne mujhe apne dost k sath bike pe dekh liya

2nd girl:

Ufff…!

phir kya hua?

girl:

papa ne bus ka kraya wapis le liya 🙂

A memon movie hero iqbalia heroin

‘A Memon Movie’

Hero: Iqbalia

Heroin: Jaibun

Vilain: Jakaria

Scene:

Vilain Heroin ko utha kar le ja raha hai, Aur Woh Chilla Rahi Hai.

‘Meekay Bachaa Iqbalia, Meekay Bacha!’

Iqbalia: Jaibun! Aaon Nai Achi Sagnu, Dukan Te Rush Lagelo Aahe! 🙂

Aik billi sheikh k ghar se roti

Aik billi sheikh k ghar se roti hue nikli

kisi ne billi se ronay ki waja puchi

billi ne rotay huay jawab diya

ik te menu marya uto mere choowa v kho lya.

Teen dost tha phela pathan dusra panjabi

Teen Dost Tha

Phela Pathan

Dusra Panjabi Or

Tesra Memon

Ramzan Ka Mahina Tha

Dostoo Na Bolaa Ka Yar Zakat Dana Ha

Too App Log Kasa Daite Ho

Too Phela Dost Pathan Bola:

Ka Hum Khali Maidan Ma Ja Kar Gol Daira

Banataa Ha Or

Asman Ma Paisa Uchalta Ha

Joo Paisa Daira Ka Bhair Jata Ha

Woo Zakat Kartta Ha

Or Joo Andar Houta Ha Woo Humara Houta Ha

Phir Punjabi Na Bola:

Ka Hum Aik Lakir Kachtta Ha

Or Paisa Uchalta Ha Joo Paisa

Left Hand Par Jatta Ha

Woo Zakat Karta Ha Or

Joo Right Hand Par Woo Humara

Phir Memon Dost Sa Poucha Ka Woo Kasa Karta Ha

Too Memon Ne Kaha:

Astag-Firullah App Log Assay Zakat Kartay Ho

Yea Lakir Fakir Keya Ha

Hum Khali Maidan Ma Jatta Ha

Or Paisay Asman Ma Uchalta Ha

Joo Paisa Asman Ma Gheya Woo Zakat Ka

Or Joo Paisa Necha Aaya Woo Humara

Dont expect too much of christmas day

Don?t expect too much of Christmas Day. You can?t crowd

into it any arrears of unselfishness and kindliness that

may have accrued during the past twelve months.

Memon pent ki silai kitni hy

Memon:

Pent Ki Silai Kitni Hy?

Tailor:

Rs. 150.

Memon:

Nekar Ki?

Tailar:

Rs. 50.

Memon: Ok.

Nikar Hi See De

Par Lmbai Pairon Tk Rkhna……

(¯`v´¯)

`*.¸.*´ lover

¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)

(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•

Prince”

1 memon subha so ko utha to

1 memon subha so ko utha to

dekha ke uski biwi mar gaye hay.

Wo foran kitchen me gaya or

apni beti ko galay laga kar rony laga or

bola,“1 banday ka nashta kam banana”

Memon ek kela kitne ka hykele wala

Memon:

ek kela kitne ka hy?Kele wala:

1 rupe

Memon:

60 pese mey milega?

Kele wala:

60 pese me sirf chilka milega

Memon:

Lo 40 pese,chilka utar k, kela dedo..

Memon at petrol pump bhai 1rs

Memon At Petrol Pump

Bhai 1rs Ka Petrol Dal Do

Salesman: Bhai Itna Sara Petrol Dalva

K Kahan Jana Hai?

Memon: Jana Kahan Hai Hm

To Aise Hi Paise Urate Hen…

Shiekh lijiye na aur rasgulle mehman

Shiekh:

lijiye na aur RASGULLE.

Mehman:

Nahi shukria main pehle hi 4 le chuka hoon.

Shiekh:

waise Liye to aap ne 7 hain lekin khair yahan gin kon raha hai.

Baniye ki biwi beemar thi light

Baniye ki biwi beemar thi:

Light na hone ki wajah se baniye ne candle jaladi aur bola

Doctor ko bulane ja raha hu,agar tumhein aisa lage ki tum nahin bachogi to pleasw yeh candle bujha dena

Memon k ghar se choha bahir ja

MEMON k ghar se choha bahir ja raha tha.

MEMON:

Kahan ja rahy ho aur kiya le kar ja rahy ho?

Choha:

BHAI bhooka marne se to behtar hai banda Hijrat kr jaey:-(

1 beautyful girl ne ghar ka kuch

1 beautyful girl ne ghar ka kuch saman

1 gali ke larky sy mangwaya to 30rs kam par gay

wo us larky ne mila diye.

ghar aakar larki sy kaha 30rs kam the mein ne mailay hain to larki ne kaha

*I LOVE U*

wo muskuraya or kaha

‘KADDU’

chal shabash 30rs nikal

moral

larka memon tha!

Ek sheikh ne arbi ko khoon de

Ek Sheikh ne Arbi ko khoon de kr us ke jan bachai

Arbi ne usey Mercedez car gift kar di.

Arbi ko phir khoon ki zarurat pari, sheikh ne phir khoon diya, ab ki bar Arbi ne Ding Dong ka packet gift kiya.

Sheikh: Gusey se! Mercedez kyun nahi di?

Arbi:kaka!ab hmari ragun me b sheikhon ka khoon dor ra hy:

Aik memon dozakh mein tha kisi ne

Aik memon dozakh mein tha

Kisi ne pocha memon to bohat Parheezgar hote hain ap yahan kaise

MEMON: Jannat main flat mila tha rest par utha diya! 🙂

Titanic k sath memon bhi doob raha

Titanic K Sath Memon Bhi Doob Raha Tha

Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha

Dost:

Oye Hans Kyun Raha Hai?

Memon:

Shukar Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda

Memon i am so miserkanjoos that i

Memon: I am so miser(kanjoos) that i went alone for my honeymoon and saved half of the money.

Sheikh: That is nothing, I saved full money. I sent my wife for honeymoon with a friend.

Eik memmon khali katorey main roti daba

Eik Memmon Khali Katorey Main

Roti Daba Kar Kha Raha Tha

Waiter Ne Deka Tu Poucha

Ap Yah Kia Kar Rahey Hian

Memon Ne Jawab Diya

Main Maths Ka Teacher Hoon Or Dall

Suppose Kar Kay Kharaha Hoon

Lets welcome the year which is fresh

Lets welcome the year which is fresh

Lets welcome the year which is fresh and new,

Lets cherish each moment it beholds, Lets celebrate

this blissful New year. Merry X-mas

Shadi me 1 memon bahut der tk

Shadi Me 1 Memon

Bahut Der Tk Khata Raha,

Kse Ne Pocha Bhae Kab Tak Khaty Rhogy?

Memon:

Yaar Me Khud Kah Kha K Thak Gya Hun

Pr Kya Kron Card Me Lkha Tha

“Dinner 7 To 10pm “

Memon apnay betay ki petaai laga raha

MEMON Apnay Betay Ki Petaai Laga Raha Tha,

Kisi Ne Poocha Kya Huwa Q Maar Rahay Ho Bacchey Ko?

*MEMON:

Kya Bataun Janab Maine Isay New Shoes Lay Kar Diye Aur Samjhaya Ke Jab Zeena Charhna 2, 2 Seerhiyan Ikatthi Charhna Ta K Jootay Jaldi Kharab Na Hon

Is Ne 3, 3 Charhnay Ke Chakkar Main Chaddi Phaar Li

Memon to his son meri dili khwahish

Memon to his son:

Meri dili khwahish hai k tum bary ho k ‘wakeel’ bano..

Son: woh kyun..??

Memon:

Ta k, mera ‘kaale coat’ tumhary kaam aa jaye… 😉

Memon ka beta girlfrend k sath ghoom

Memon ka beta girlfrend k sath ghoom k aaya to baap ne pocha

kitney paise kharch kiye?

Beta: 50 rupee!

Baap: bas!!!

Beta: Abba us k pas 50 rupee

hi thy.

1 memon bache ko le kr nai

1 memon 1 bache ko le kr nai ki dukan me dakhl hua.

Memon ne baal katwaye, shave banvai or naai ko kaha:

Bachay k bal kato, me sabzi le kr abi ata hoon.

Naai ne bachay k baal kaat diye pr memon wapas na aya.

Jb kafi der guzar gai to naai ne bachay se poocha:

Yar tumhary abbu kahan reh gaye?

Bacha bola:wo mere abbu to nai thy

Naai: To phir kon the?

Bacha: pta nai, me gali me khel rha tha,

ye aya or kaha aao me tumhary baal muft me katwa doon

Geo Memon Geo

Kitny hamdard milydost mily yar mily sb

Kitny hamdard mily,dost mily, yar mily

Sb ubharty hoy soraj k paristar mily

Zindagi tu hamain bazaar men kun lay aie

Hm to YOSUF b nhi k koi kharedar mily

Memon ask to taxi driver abdullah shah

Memon ask to Taxi Driver: Abdullah Shah Ghazi k mazaar jao gay?

Taxi Driver: Han jaon ga.

Memon ne jaib se shopper nikala or kaha:

Wapsi main langar ki biryani lete aana.

Akri moty baeri plang te sutti ve

Akri moty baeri plang te sutti ve k achanak jaljalo avyo ta hu plang se payi wi.

.

Hun jo gherwaro jaldi jaldi bhagi ne aawyo ne chui k tu jaljale ji wajaa se paiye wi ayien ya toje payi winen si jaljalo aawyo???

sheikh mehman se thanda peo ge

*: Sheikh mehman se: thanda peo ge ya garam?

Mehman: Dono ley ayen,

Sheikh: Begum!

Pani da 1 glass freezer vichon,

Te 1 glass geezer vichon lay a.

Dont expect too much of christmas day

Don?t expect too much of Christmas Day.

You can?t crowd into it any arrears of

unselfishness and kindliness that

may have accrued during the past twelve months.

Sheikh apne bachon sejo rat ko khana

Sheikh Apne bachon se:Jo Rat ko khana ni khega use 5 rupe milege

Sab bache 5,5 Rupe lekar sogae

Subha ko Sheikh bola:

Jo 5 Rupe dega usko Nashta milega

Aik shaikh bus me sfr kr raha

Aik Shaikh bus me sfr kr raha tha,

Achanak bus be’qabu ho kr drya me ja giri,

Hr koi apni zindgi bachany k liye terney laga, mgr shaikh tarte hue kisi ko talash kar raha tha,

1 aadmi ne poocha aap kisey dhoond rahy ho,to shaikh ne jawab dya.

.

.

O yaar ,conductor kithy gya,

25 rupaye bkaya c mery.

Memon at shop bhai 1 rs

Memon At shop:

Bhai 1 RS ka load kar do

Shopkeeper:

Itna load karwa k Call Krni Hai ya SMS

Memon:

Krna te Khuch Ve Nhi bs aiven paise uraan di adat aaa

Dont expect too much of christmas day

Don’t expect too much of Christmas Day. You can’t crowd

into it any arrears of unselfishness and kindliness that

may have accrued during the past twelve months.

Dabbey main dabba cake memon

Dabbey Main Dabba

Dabbey Main Cake

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MEMON Ki Olad

SMS t0 Bhej . . ;->

Memon 2 son meri dili khwahish

Memon 2 Son:

Meri Dili Khwahish

He K Tum Bary Ho K

‘WAKEEL’Bano

Son:Wo Q?

Memon:

Ta K Mera Valimay

Wala ‘Black Coat’

Tumhary Kaam Aajaye.

Memon jao 2 dukano se 3 3 kabab

MEMON:

Jao..!

2 dukano se 3-3 kabab le k aao…

Servant:

Janab..!

6 ikhattey kyun nahi..?

Memon:

Nalaik Aadmi..!

Chatni 0r Piyaz ziyada miley gi… ;->