Funny Jokes Collection

Jhoom re ek sahab nashay me larkhratay

?JHOOM RE? Ek sahab nAshay me LarkhratAY hUay fOOT paTH per JA rahay thay..! Pol?CemAn nE Roka oR poocha:Tum Jantay hO mA?N Kon hoON?

Boss tum ne kis larki ko secertry

Boss: Tum Ne Kis Larki Ko Secertry Ki Job Par Rakh Lia Usy To Gramar Hi Nahi Aati. Manager: Ap Ne Gramer Kaha Tha?

When i open my eyes every morning

When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you…. Why should only i suffer!!!

N o t h i n g

N o t h i n g I n T h e W o r l d I s M o r e E

Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a

Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye, I don’t worry I don’t cry, I’m just happy that cows can’t fly!

Height of good luck teacher hey

Height of Good Luck….!… Teacher: Hey! Stand up. Tell me two pronouns. . . . . . Student: Who? Me? Teacher: Very good…..Sit down

The saudi ambassador to the un has

The Saudi Ambassador to the UN has just finished giving a speech and walks out into the lobby where he meets President Bush. They

Boy to girl will you marry

Boy To Girl : Will you marry me . . .? (Girl remains silent…) Boy : Plz speak something, I m dying. . .

In life wen u r alone

In Life Wen U R Alone When U R Crying Wen U R Upset Wen U R Sad Jus Make A Call 2Me Bcoz

Ocean full of syllabus river questions

Ocean full of syllabus River full of questions Bucket level we study Mug level we answer & Marks comes like a drop then why

Class rooms r like train 1st

Class Rooms R Like Train 1st 2 Bench R Executive Coaches Reserved For VIP Middle 2 R General Compartment N Last 2 R Sleeper

Bush asks godwhen will iraq be mine

Bush asks God:When will Iraq be mine? God:Not in ur life time.bush cries. Mushraf asks God:When will Kashmir be in Pakistan? God:Not in ur

Prayer of an employee dear

Prayer Of An Employee : Dear God, Give Me The Wisdom To Understand My Boss.. .. Give Me The Love To Forgive Him.. ..

Once a man went to the doctor

ONCE A MAN WENT TO THE DOCTOR AND SAID : Doctor!! Doctor!!! i just have 40 seconds to live :O Doctor replied: OK please

There is one thing that both

There Is One Thing That Both Drunks And Geographers Agrees Upon … . . . . . . . . . . . .

Someday u may lose ur hair

Someday u may lose ur hair. u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind. But 1 thing u will never

Short course to be a dermatologist if

Short course to be a dermatologist: If it is dry – add moist; if it is moisten – add dryness. Congratulations, now you are

I saw him on facebooki added him

I saw him on facebook,I added him… . . . …. . . . I saw him outside,I deleted him 😀 ……….Y display pictures

As i m now in da mst

As i m now in da mst imp. yr of my career i hv startd stdyng n hv dcided nt 2 msg anymore,i hope,

Karachi me banks me barhti hui robbries

KARACHI mE banks me barhti hui robbries pr control k Liay MAIN bank me aLARM System laga dia,jiska button cashier k paon k kareb

If 15 225 3125 4625then 5 think

If? 1=5, 2=25, 3=125, 4=625,then 5=? Think b4 scrolling down! Ans is 1 ,remember 1st line 1=5! Moral: Dont complicate simple things in LiFe

All flowers cannot represent the love but

All flowers cannot represent the love but Rose did it All animals cannot speak but parrot did it and all monkeys cannot read sms

A memon had an accident in

A Memon Had An Accident In His New BMW When Cops Arrived, Memon Cried …”Officer My Brand New Car ! ! ” Cops Says:

Teacher you missed school yesterday didnt you

TeAcHeR: “YoU MiSsEd ScHoOl YeStErDaY DiDn’T YoU?” StUdEnT: “No NoT EvEn A LiTtLe BiT.” Sameer +92 300 2711 588 ~ Tum Bin ~…

Galilo great mind einstein genious newton

GALILO: Great mind EINSTEIN: Genious mind NEWTON: Extraordinary mind BILL GATES: Brillant mind Me: Master mind U: Oh! Neve mind…

Pakistani courses mbbs master in bomb blasting

Pakistani Courses:- MBBS:-Master In Bomb Blasting Strategies CAT:-Career In Alqaeda & Taliban IIT:-Islamic Institute of Terrorism JEE:-Jehadi Entrance Exam….

Teacher can anyone tell me advantages of

Teacher: Can anyone tell me advantages of chemicals? Little Johnny: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made!…

Buhot ache wah kya baat hai

Buhot Ache Wah Kya Baat Hai Buhot Aala Gr8 Yaar Zabardast Daad Deni Paregi Brilliant Dil Khush Kardiya La Jawab Khubsoorat Bari Himmat Hai

3 friends lived in the same flat

3 friends lived in the same flat on the 110th floor. One day the lift wasn’t working. So they had to climb the stairs.

The new england journal of medicine reports

The New England Journal Of Medicine Reports That… ! ” 9 Out Of 10 Doctors Agree That 1 Out Of 10 Doctors Is An

9 advices to youth 1 never

9 Advices To Youth: 1> Never Love A Girl/Boy Truly …2> Never Lie To Parents 3> Never Be Rude To Anyone. 4> Always Say

Give 1 english word 4 apny

give 1 english word 4 apny kiye pay pani pher dena…….. dont know… FLUSH;-)…

A teenage girl had been talking on

A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up. "Wow!," SAID her FATHER, "That

A boy sees beautiful girl sitting

A Boy Sees A Beautiful Girl Sitting Right Next To Him & Writes In A Paper “I Love You, Do You Love Me?” And

Girls are never wrong just sometimes

Girls Are Never Wrong Just Sometimes Confused , Rude, Stubborn, Senseless, Emotional, Unchangeable , Crazy, Stupid …n Even Mad But NEVER WRONG … =P

M0st irritating and ann0ying m0ment youre

M0st irritating and ann0ying m0ment: You’re getting bored and n0 messages, n0t even a single text! Suddenly your cell rings, you rush t0wards it

Qwhat do you when a blond throws

Q:What do you do when a blond throws a hand grenade at you? Ans: Pull the pin and throw it back. …

The w0rlds thinnest b00k is titled by

The w0rld?s thinnest b00k is titled by, ?What W0men Want? It has 0nly 0ne w0rd written in it, . . . . . .

An old man was wondering if his

An old man was wondering if his wife had a hearing problem. So one day, he stood behind her while she was sitting in

I used facebook for a few days

I Used Facebook For A Few Days And Got Addicted To It.. But I Am Studying Since I Was 4.. .. .. .. ..

Teacher how can v stop milk from

Teacher: how can v stop milk from getting sour? Johnny: keep it in the cow….!! ;-)…

Students vs teacherz when we r

“StuDenTs Vs TeAcHeRz”.. . . WheN We R iN CLass, We R ‘StuDenTs’, WheN They R iN CLass, They R ‘ScHoLaRs’ WheN We CoRecT

A man notice that his credit card

A Man Notice That His Credit Card Had Been Stolen But He Didn’t Report It..! Why..?? The Thief Was Spending Less Than His Wife….

A thought for all graduates quota

A Thought For All Graduates… "A Thermometer Isn’t The Only Thing That Gets A Degree Without Having Any Brain…" |’!’|…

Who is a psychiatrist qualified

Who Is A Psychiatrist ? A Qualified Person Who Gives You An Expensive, Critical Analysis About Yourself, …Which Your Friends Give You “Free” Of

A young boss said quotthe great

A young Boss said "the great attraction in our job is that every day is a pay day "…

U r a donkey d 4

u r a donkey d 4 decent .. o 4 outclass .. n 4 nice .. k 4 kind .. e 4 excelent ..

Facebook paper q1 define add

FACEBOOK PAPER Q1 . Define add as friend ? Q2 . What does status means ? … Q3 . What do u mean by

A new vaccum salesman knockd on da

A new vaccum salesman knockd on da door. A tall lady answerd it. B4 she cud speak, d salesman barged into da living room

Lady is this my train station master

Lady: Is this my train..? Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company.. Lady: Don’t try to be funny. I mean to ask

Attachment is not when two people chat

Attachment is not when two people chat Day & Night. . . . Its when someone E-mails U and Adds an Image or Data

How to avoid bad dreams night

how to avoid bad dreams @ night…? very simple yaar dont remember ur face b4 sleep… & remember my face for sweet dreams… 🙂

Girl which computer do u have boy

Girl- which computer do u have? Boy- I have a computer with intel core i7 processor at 3.3 ghz, windows 7, 64 bit, 8gb

Fantastic answer for why didnt u

Fantastic answer for , Why didn’t u receive my Call? . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

2 co workers working on project that was

2 co-workers working on project that was not going as planned,over coffee break 1 says:Someday, we’ll look back on this, laugh nervously and change

My parents must be proud because

My Parents Must Be PROUD, Because I m Addicted To F a c e b o o k Not D r u g s..!!

Raabert boss mere dono bachon ke liye

Raabert: Boss, mere dono bachon ke liye koi naam bataiye.. Ajeet: Ek ka naam rakho Peter

My has changed so plz give

My # has changed. So plz give me a call on my new # is.. 021 15 agar mera naukar uthaye to use 2-4

Never kiss a police woman she ll

Never kiss a police woman. she ‘ll say stop and handsup. Never kiss a nurse she ‘ll say next plz. Always kiss a teacher.

Hi need 1 girl 2 marry

Hi’ Need 1 girl 2 marry . . . Age no bar, Color no bar, Height no bar, Caste no bar, But girl’s father

Men opause men strual pain men tal illness guy necologist his terectomy

MEN-opause MEN-strual pain MEN-tal illness GUY-necologist HIS-terectomy EVER NOTICED HOW WOMENS PROBLEMS START WITH MEN?? …

Top 3 universities rule 1

Top 3 Universities Rule : 1: B Quite In The Class Coz Others Are Sleeping 2: Don’t Forget To Carry Books It Works As

Kid why some of ur hair

KID :- Why some of ur hair are white dad ? DAD : – Every time a son make his dad unhappy , one

A little kid walks into a city

A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, "If my dad was a bull and

A shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand

A shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read

If time doesnt wait 4 u

If time doesn’t wait 4 u Don’t worry! Just remove the damn battery from ur clock & Enjoy life!…

3 unforgettable things in our life

3 Unforgettable Things In Our Life…. 1-Breakfast 2-Lunch 3-Dinner No Need To Be Emotional…….

Dear god give me the wisdom

Dear God, Give Me The Wisdom To Understand My Boss.. .. Give Me The Love To Forgive Him.. .. Give Me The Patience To

This time im sureampamp i n going2say

This time… I’m sure& I n going2say it… I I L I LO I LOV I LOVE I LOVE Y I LOVE YO I

Amazing truth when your mom decides

Amazing truth : When your mom decides to be in your room while you are on the computer.. . You just switch to GOOGLE

A woman met a man walking along

A woman met a man Walking along the streets Wearing only one shoe. “Just Lost A Shoe?” She asked He answered: “Nope, Just Found

A boy going in car suddenly he

A boy going in car. Suddenly he saw a girl lying in the middle of road. He came out and.. To be continued.. To

Driving styles in diff countries 1hands on

driving styles in diff countries- …………1hands on steering wheel,1 hand out windo-sydny ………….1 hand on steering and 1 hand on horn – japan.. ………….1

Read slowly u r que tea

Read slowly- u r que tea, luv lee, grey ate, on nest, at track thief, cheer fool, soup pub & u r my most

If u need advice sms me

if u need ADVICE SMS ME if u need a FRIEND CALL ME if u need HELP E-MAIL ME if u need MONEY The

Breaking news latest most important aham tareen

Breaking news . . . Latest news . . . Most important . . . Aham-Tareen . . . Taza-tareen . . . Dont

Customer to waiter everyday you charge

Customer to waiter : Everyday you charge me money for a cup of coffee. How wonderful it would be if you serve me coffee

Exams are like girlfriends 1 too

EXAMS are like GIRLFRIENDS: 1. Too many questions. 2. Difficult to understand. 3. Too much explaination is needed. 4. Result is always Fail …

Bush asks godwhen will iraq be mine

Bush asks God:When will Iraq be mine? God:Not in ur life time.bush cries. Mushraf asks God:When will Kashmir be in Pakistan? God:Not in ur

Definition of laziness itz

Definition Of Laziness :- -:- iT’z A tElEnT oF tAlKiNg ReSt BeFoRe YoU gEt TiRed -:-…

c r u s h e

” C R U S H E S ” Would Be A Lot Less Fun . . . If You Didn’t Have ” B

Definition of laziness itz

Definition Of Laziness :- -:- iT’z A tElEnT oF tAlKiNg ReSt BeFoRe YoU gEt TiRed -:-…

Heights of shock boy msgs her

Heights Of Shock. Boy msgs her gf: jan i can’t live wthout u,Wil u Marry me.? . . . . . . . .

This is quottop secretquot and bottom

This is "Top Secret" . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

If u have the talent and skill

If u have the talent, and u have the skill, and u want to do somthing 4 others then don’t waste your time, Join…

Teacher johny if your father earned 100000

Teacher: Johny, if your father earned $100,000 and gave half of it to your mother, what would she have? Little johny: A heart a

A private employee was rewarded a bicycle

A Private Employee was rewarded a bicycle by his organisation.It was so beautiful but didnt’ve a Carrier 8 the back, He requested 2 get

When you have done wrong and are

When you have done wrong and you are in trouble, go to your parents for a Sound Advice, . . . . . U’ll

A man phones a mental hospital and

A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist if there is anybody in Room 27. The receptionist goes,checks the room, comes back

Hotho se jo choo liya ehsaas aab

Hotho se jo choo liya, Ehsaas Aab tak hai, Aankhe Nam hai, Aur sanso mein Aag aab tak hain… Aur kyo na ho… Khayi

Ek shaks gussy me police station gya

Ek shaks gussy me police station gya aur bolaa… Meri complain note kro mje dhamki wale letter mil rahe hain Inspector : ap ko

Dont u have enough concentration to study

dont u have enough concentration to study?………………… study?………….. follow my advice…… drink minimum water so that dilution decreases and concentration increases…………!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1…

Why is the fire engine red in

Why is the fire engine red in color?Engine red in color? Color?Bcoz fire engine has a ladder..A lader has steps.. Steps come from a

giggling bites call a girl

! Giggling Bites ! “Call a girl pretty & She will remember it for 5 minutes..! Call a girl ugly & She will remember

Boss itne kam kapray pehan k q

Boss: Itne kam kapray pehan k q aai ho? Aadha jism dikh raha hai. Girl: Itni salary mein yehi aata hai! Boss: Manager, Iss

I saw your face as you walked

I saw your face as you walked by but then I saw a better guy …

U think of me amp i u

U think of me & i think of u. When v both think of each other, do u know wat it means? It means

Doctor amp engineer loves a same girl

Doctor & Engineer loves a same girl. Engineer before going to out-station for a week, gave 7 Apples to the girl. Why ?? Bcoz…

Ppl say a kiss is on

Ppl Say A Kiss Is On HEAD A Sweet Kiss On CHEEKS A Passionate Kiss On LIPS A Romantic Kiss On NECK But Seriously